How To Have Epic Sales Confidence: Celebrate Wins & Face Weaknesses

Transcription Tyler Tapp 00:00:00 All right , everybody , welcome to second in command . We are so excited to have you back . It is we are on a long journey here and it has been so fun to have the different guests that we've had on. I'm super excited today to have Michelle here. She comes from a sales background and we don't actually have a lot of salespeople on our show, which I am excited about because she actually teaches people how to do sales. Right. We'll get more into it. But on her website , the one thing I did see is she does close more sales without working more. I love that . So she's obviously going to explain that way better than I do. So, Michelle , I want to know where you came from , where you're going , and just let the audience let the audience know that . Michelle Wong 00:00:38 Yeah, absolutely . Thanks for having me, joyler. Super excited . Yeah. Chat about this . It's sales. Funny enough , I used to hate sales. I actually come from this background of being a serial entrepreneur for the last 1718 years. In the beginning of my journey , I absolutely did not enjoy it. I tried to outsource it, whatever format I could because I was more on the creative side. I liked building , I liked creating teams and stuff like that , and just building the product or service . But sales was always felt a little . Tyler Tapp 00:01:16 Icky to me, as it does to most . Right. Michelle Wong 00:01:19 Yeah. Right. So through my kind of experience , I really noticed the businesses that failed was the ones that I tried to outsource sales too quickly , and the ones that succeeded was the ones I actually learned the skill set to handle it on my own. So what really just got me here, I was not actually forced into it because I had business partners for one particular business and they were supposed to take care of sales while I did ops. And it just didn't work out that way. It just didn't pan out . So I take it all in my own hands and after that , that never. Tyler Tapp 00:01:56 Happened as an entrepreneur . Right, right . Michelle Wong 00:02:00 And I just loved it. I absolutely loved it. And I think once you start diving a little bit deeper into sales, behind the facade that we've , I guess , learnt over the decades , I think , growing up as I don't want to be the ones from my age, but I will. Being almost 38 now, when I was a kid, growing up in sales per se was like your sleazy car salesman . It was like weird icky, like just door knocking , all that kind of stuff . Which , hey, if you still do that , all the kudos to you, because it takes a lot to be able to. Tyler Tapp 00:02:37 Yeah, we all still take our hats off to people that can do that . Michelle Wong 00:02:40 Exactly. But that's why I think we think it's icky. So once I learned the actual process of sales, really at the bottom of it is just having a genuine conversation with another person and providing a solution to the problem . That's as simple as it gets . And when you kind of come from that angle, it's like, yeah, I love helping people , so I love sales. Tyler Tapp 00:03:06 That's awesome. I love that . No, it's funny. I always joke everyone says this for a long time , I'm not a salesman . Right? That's why I said it before we started the interview here. It's not but you don't feel like a salesman . But like we said, everyone's a salesman . You're telling a story and you're listening to other people . That is sales. It's listening to what they need and being like, okay, sweet , I can provide service to you, or I know someone who can provide service for you, and I'm going to help you out . Michelle Wong 00:03:33 Totally. It's an everyday life. I think when you actually look at it, we just don't realize, like, trying to convince your partner to go to the restaurant you want to go for date night , that's sales. Trying to convince your kids , if you have kids , to go to bed at a certain time , that's also sales. Tyler Tapp 00:03:52 I thought that was a battle . I didn't know that was sales. Michelle Wong 00:03:56 It's a different type , but yeah, so everything , once you look at that in a natural sense, is just take it for what it is. It's just finding a benefit that both parties are going to walk away with . Tyler Tapp 00:04 :11 Yeah, that's not the question I want to ask. Where do you feel like most people get hung up in the sales process or in developing their talent as a salesman ? Michelle Wong 00:04 :27 I think it's your own confidence in yourself that is the core piece of it. Because I think once you have confidence in who you are, of course , definitely the product or service you're trying to sell, like actually wanting to sell this thing , not thinking it's a terrible product or the risk , because that's never going to go well, but just having confidence in yourself . Because I think a lot of people get hung up is because they fear rejection . So they fear someone saying no or that they're being pushy and all this kind of stuff . There's a different way of selling . There are ways that you can adapt for yourself that you don't have to follow everything . Even my clients don't have to follow everything I say. It's finding what works for you. And when you're confident in yourself , it's going to help you drive that kind of pathway for yourself so much easier. Tyler Tapp 00:05:22 So that's where I would say, yeah, I love that . I think the reason a lot of people's confidence gets down in sales is because when someone says, no, I don't want what you're selling , they take it personally . Right. And I think that confidence just goes like a way where they say, hey, I'm not a salesman . Right. Because you get that boost or the lack of boost every time you're like, well, they don't like me. I didn't do good and it's like, maybe that's not it. Or even if it was, who cares? Move on, next one. Michelle Wong 00:05:51 Exactly. And that's also what people tying in the identity of their business or the sales with themselves . So when you're saying like, that's why I don't even like calling myself a salesperson . It's more of like a solution provider , just changing little things here and there of how you identify and just your vocabulary of how you talk to yourself . Or just like I said, just changing that title . You then have a different outlook of that . You don't see yourself as, oh, I need to sell this person , instead of asking yourself , oh, I just want to help this person get closer to their goals . So that really helps . That kind of entanglement , so to speak . Tyler Tapp 00:06:32 Yeah, exactly . So I like people to take nuggets away. That's what I would say. I love grab nuggets from a podcast . That's what we all listen to them for, right ? It's taking those couple of things . So what's something you can give to everyone to say, hey, this is how you overcome your confidence barriers . Michelle Wong 00:06:49 I think first thing to not get like woo on everybody , because I think that's the end part of it is definitely like healing yourself and yourself , value yourself worth , all of that is going to ultimately help your confidence . But simply just finding I would say that where you should start is double down on your own strengths . Really be aware of what you're good at and what you might not be as great at yet. And double down on the strengths and leave the weaknesses aside until you build that confidence for yourself . Another way of just kind of do that , where I teach my clients , is like, put yourself like what I call a hype sheet . And it's literally listing anything in your life, whether since you were a child to now, anything that you've accomplished that you just felt good about . And so when you do feel unconfident or just like whatever , you can pull up this hype sheet and just remind yourself of these things so that it's a constant reminder because that's the thing that we tend to forget . People don't celebrate wins enough . They believe that they have to hit the, whatever , six figures , seven or eight , and then maybe they can celebrate . But simply getting someone interested or having a great conversation , like celebrate that , celebrate your small wins and that will stack up eventually and that will give you the confidence where then you don't care about rejection . Where you're just like, let me just have a conversation with the next person and then the next, and then the. Tyler Tapp 00:08 :24 Next, well, something I want to add to that or just to caveat on the back , I want people to celebrate their failures . Celebrate your wins, but celebrate screwing up. You just messed up. That's awesome. Instead of taking it in this like, oh, I messed up, it hurts , right ? Because that's what we all do naturally . I think that's the natural human. But it's okay. The more you mess up, the closer you are to knowing what not to do so that you can do the right thing 100%. Michelle Wong 00:08 :51 You get to your success so much faster. Tyler Tapp 00:08 :53 Oh yeah. Michelle Wong 00:08 :53 That's what I've realized now. But in the beginning of my entrepreneurship , oh my God, that was the hardest thing to get through . I filed for bankruptcy , like in the beginning of my journey . And that was such a dark cloud over my head for so long. And like I was talking about was identifying when you put that identity on of, oh, I'm a failure . You're not a failure . You just failed at something or you just didn't succeed . Take that away and take it as a lesson. So I absolutely agree with you. The more you can see, quote unquote , failures as just a lesson in disguise , you're going to get to where you need to get so much faster. Tyler Tapp 00:09:33 Yeah, absolutely . Kind of piggyback again off that same point that you brought up earlier of celebrating wins and knowing even though you may not be good at this , when you're struggling , think about what are you good at? Right? So for instance , this is actually hilarious . So people listening won't see this , but I have this dinky little motorcycle , this dirt bike toy. I grew up riding motorcycles and stuff from the time I was like six years old. Right? It's like 20 years, 25 years, however long it's been. And who knows , you lose track after 25, after 21. Michelle Wong 00:10:04 It's like, oh yeah, I'm legal when you're drinking . Tyler Tapp 00:10:07 Right, that's why. But regardless , I have that toy motorcycle , a little modern motorcycle to remind myself when I'm having a conversation where I start feeling imposter syndrome or when I start feeling like I'm not good enough to tangle with this person . I look at that and literally the thought that goes my brain is like, hey, I may not be good at that , but hey, at least I'm good at that . And it is a trigger in my brain to say, you know what , I am at least good at something else. So I can talk to this person because I am a good person . I am good at these things that I already know how to, but I may not be good at what they need, but I'm good at what I am good at. Michelle Wong 00:10:40 Exactly. And just to extend that , if you were able to figure out something that you're good at, you're going to be able to figure out something else that you can be good at too. Tyler Tapp 00:10:50 Yeah, absolutely . Michelle Wong 00:10:52 And so same with me. A lot of stuff on my high sheet have nothing to do with sales or business . It's just things that happened in my life. Like I was a DJ for eleven years and music and sound just comes easy to me and I'm good at that . But it has no correlation to what I do now. But it does help when I'm feeling uncomfortable because everybody , no matter what stage of success you're at, there's still a level of imposter syndrome that we have from time to time and it's just learning how to manage it as best as you can. Tyler Tapp 00:11:27 Absolutely . I love that . I feel like a conversation I get into an accident on the show a lot is when you got good at something , you went through a process to get there . You just have to get your brain to connect with that process that you went through to get there , to get where you're trying to go. It's different for everybody . But habits are a huge part of that , right ? Habits are a big part of that . So I was going to ask you what are some habits you feel like you have to help people with a lot as a coach , if I may, do you go by coach ? Is that a good way to put sales coach or a solutions coach ? That's the better way to put it. Right. Michelle Wong 00:12:01 There you go. Tyler Tapp 00:12:03 What are some of those daily habits that you have to teach people constantly to help them gain that confidence ? Michelle Wong 00:12:12 Yeah, I think definitely one is gratitude . When you have more gratitude in your life, you tend to not be so focused on yourself and kind of the things that you lack. Gratitude , really. So I definitely have a gratitude journal every morning and some people think it has to be very specific , but I just let my mind run like in the morning . I'm just like I'm thankful to be alive. I'm thankful to have this water in front of me. I'm thankful for the weather. Whatever it is, it can be so random . It's just stacking again these things up so you see there's goodness in your life and not just like this , oh my God, I feel like crap . Or like this is not working out . I'm not where I'm at yet. That's one of the things meditating as well. And that has just been huge to release kind of your mind and give yourself some space so that you can get into if you are taking sales calls or whatever with a fresh start , every day is a fresh start . And so sometimes if you had some days, even I have a bad sales call day and I'm just like, oh my God, that was terrible . But when I wake up in the morning , it's a fresh start . Whatever happens in the past , we cannot change and so just leave it behind . And so meditating really helps me with that . And so those are the main two , I would say habits , so to speak , that really help you just build up that confidence . The more you do it, the more easier it's going to get and it's just kind of ingrained into you. Tyler Tapp 00:13:53 Yeah. So then what are the next steps after ? So once you feel like your confidence is up there because I feel like entrepreneurs should go through a journey of, hey, I'm screwing up, I'm screwing up, I'm screwing up and screwed up, then hopefully you get to the point where you start not screwing up and you start figuring things out of what your offer is and how you want want to get it out to the world . What are some of those next step ? Once you say, okay, I'm getting some confidence in myself, that imposter syndrome is going away, what do they do? How do they start getting better at their sales? Michelle Wong 00:14:22 Yeah, I think that's why I love sales, because I think I'm such a learner for all my life. And with sales, it's something you constantly learn every day. You can improve it every day, every hour. And so I think when you're at the level that you are confident in whatever you're doing , try to then go work all those weaknesses that you listed out in the beginning , because now it's time with your confidence to bring up those weaknesses to strengths . That's why I say leave that until you have the confidence . Because when you're trying to work on something you're not great at, when you're not really confident , you're always going to kind of be stuck in going into the cycle of self hatred or just getting down on yourself . When you're confident there's something even it doesn't work out . When you're trying to bring up your weaknesses , you'll understand it's like, that's okay, I'll just keep trying , and eventually it's going to work out . Tyler Tapp 00:15:20 It sounds like you're saying, like, gaining the confidence to address your weaknesses . Michelle Wong 00:15:26 Yeah. Tyler Tapp 00:15:26 Is that right ? Michelle Wong 00:15:27 100%. Tyler Tapp 00:15:28 That's awesome. I love that because I feel like weaknesses are something that it really is extremely hard to address those when you're confronted by them every day. It's hard to stare at them in the face and be like, this is the dragon that I have to fight , and says, hey, I'm going to put those in a box. What you're saying is, I'm going to put those in a box for later. I'm going to cage that dragon up for a while , but then I am going to take that dragon . At some point , I'm going to find it. Yeah. Michelle Wong 00:15:56 Because like I said, it's just so much easier to tame. Just as long as you're aware of that dragon and you know where it is, awareness is key. And then you can release your dragon , so to speak , and then kind of get it to fly. Tyler Tapp 00:16:13 I love that there's a thing on your website . I'm going to keep bringing this up, guys . I love her website . Go check it out . It's called busycoach .com. You put on here. I'll be your personal agent , tiger mom. And then what you say below that , I love this because I think this speaks to what we're talking about . I would encourage you to get your crap done, push you forward without the guilt trip , feed you the insane amount of actionable knowledge so you hit your goals with speed and ease. It sounds to me after reading that , listening to you here, that you take the time to help them get to that confident place as a coach so that they can push through the crap , right , and be able to get there , get to their goals way faster. Is that correct ? Michelle Wong 00:16:58 Yeah, I think just like if there was one lesson that I could leave, like after my whole crazy journey of entrepreneurship and different types of businesses and all that kind of stuff , it is absolutely confidence . Confidence will get you so far, like skills , strategies , tactics . Sure it's important , but honestly , if you have no confidence to even try or even take that first step , all of that doesn't matter . So it's really like building yourself up to take the hits and take the punches as you go along. And that's really just what entrepreneurship is about . It's just like this insane level of personal development that you just keep taking punches and keep getting yourself back up and to try again. And the more successful you are, the less is going to hurt . Tyler Tapp 00:17:50 Yeah. Especially in the to the classic I don't know what it is, but the pain starts to hurt less. There's a whole phrase for that . I can't remember about that . But sooner or later, if you've been hit enough times and your arm in the same spot , your body starts to literally say, it doesn't hurt anymore . Michelle Wong 00:18:07 Yeah. That's exactly what you want because there's never going to be a time where it's not going to be hard. Tyler Tapp 00:18:14 Yeah, absolutely . I think I've got twelve thoughts going through my head. I really like this topic of confidence because I struggled with it for a very long time . Just as a human now, I have very young parts of my life that I'm not confident in, but the parts that I've become confident in, I love being able to hold to those like I talked about earlier, holding to those when I'm facing those weaknesses and saying, you know what , I'm not good at this . A huge thing that I struggled with for a long time and is still working on was talking with people that were way more far down the road or way more wealthy than I was, which is in sales. You get there a lot , right ? You're talking to the CEO of a company that's worth two or $300 million and you're like, yeah, this guy pretty much knows way more than I do. What do I honestly have to offer ? So that's imposter syndrome 101, right ? Yeah, and I dealt with that for a long time . But when I started to look at them and say, you know what ? I need to be able to look at them in the face and say, I honestly don't know the answer to what you're needing right now, but I will be the guy that will go find it for you. And even if that's not me, I don't care. I'm going to go find it because I care about where you're going . Yeah. And I think as an entrepreneur , people don't hold on to that enough . I think it gets to the point where you're like, I can only work with people that are in this level here that I'm comfortable with , but it's like, go shoot , go talk to somebody . Go shoot , force . It's not come out right . Go talk to somebody . Go talk to someone and shoot for the moon, right ? You never know what's going to happen if you just go and walk in there confidently and say, hey, where are you trying to get to? Right? Like, this is where you're at? Awesome. I love it. Where are you trying to go? And then they tell you and be like, well, I actually know somebody , or, hey, I am that person that can help you get from there to there . And did you ever think about doing this this way? I have talked to me and my business partners , my brother . We've talked to so many people that we can't tangle with , right ? And if we were to sit down and have a conversation about business , we couldn't tangle with them . But we sat down and said, hey, you know what ? I can help you with that . Or I know a guy that can help you with that . Those relationships have developed into these grander , bigger sales opportunities for us because all we did was build that trust in us, saying, you know what ? Even if I don't know, I got your back , I'm going to go find someone who can help you. Whether that's me or not , I don't care. Michelle Wong 00:20:32 You're a solution provider . And that's really what it is when you just stick with that identity of being a solution provider . And I'm totally the same. Like, in the beginning , it was like, oh, my God, I can't believe I'm talking to this person or be in the same room and yeah, you shrink and you're kind of like, no, this is not for me. I can't do this . But once you start identifying , I was like, you know what ? I'm pretty confident I've been able to figure other things out before . I failed before , but I've been able to figure it out . I'm pretty sure I can figure this out too. Nothing that I will do it myself, but there's definitely a solution out there that I could find . I mean, we all have Google at the end of the day, we all have resources that we can tap into , and I think we forget about that because we compare ourselves so much , especially with social media and all this kind of stuff . Like, social media is the biggest facade out there . Some people who I get on calls on and they're just so timid and they're like, well, no, I feel like, I need 100,000 followers or a million followers before I can put out this offer or talk about it. Most of those people at a million followers or whatever probably don't make that much money. It's not about the amount of followers . It's like doing the right things and just going at it. And so when you don't stretch yourself beyond what you think you're capable of, you're never going to grow. You're never going to get to that next level. You're just going to keep dreaming about it and just be upset at yourself for wherever you're at. Tyler Tapp 00:22:13 Yeah, absolutely . I love that we're going to end that interview there , guys . I love ending on a high note . I really feel like if you guys are going to take away anything , it's what she said. Confidence , confidence , confidence . It repeated a million times . I always ask people at the end of the interviews , if this entire situation of podcasting or your business got blown to pieces , what would you hold to? And you already answered that question . Confidence . You said that . And I was like, I could ask that already. So honestly , I love that you brought that up, though , guys . Whatever. I love that you brought that up because it really, honestly , is the end all, be all in business , right ? And in your life, really, but in business , because that's who we're talking to right now, is confidence . So guys , please work on your confidence . And what we mean by that is what she already said. So I don't even have to repeat what she said. So go back if you did listen to the rest of the episode by this point , I'm sure you have. So I'm not going to repeat it. But everybody , thanks for coming by today. We're going to put all the links to Michelle here in the show, notes everywhere to reach her and go do so. See you guys next time . Michelle Wong 00:23:21 Thanks for having me. Tyler Tapp 00:23:22 Yeah. All right . Perfect clap, right ? Well, clap another one of those . I'm still working on my clothes . I suck at closing the things , but that's okay. That's one of my conference workers . Michelle , that was awesome. Thank you so much . That was such a fun interview . I really appreciate you being on. Michelle Wong 00:23:38 Yeah, honestly , thanks for having me. It was fun. It was fun chatting with you. Tyler Tapp 00:23:41 Absolutely . Let me ask you this . I always ask everyone this before I'm done, which is hilarious because we talked about this the whole time , but where are you at? Where are you going ? Right? Michelle Wong 00:23:49 That's a great question . Yeah, I think , like I said, I really want to take this b to be offered to the next, I guess , stage for a good time . It was just coaching other coaches on sales, but what I realized is a lot of coaches or consultants don't even want to be coached on sales, or they don't think they have a sales problem or the time . So now it's more of me coaching closers to place into people's businesses because what I also saw there was like a lot of fluff in nowadays of closers where everyone says they're a closer and then they get place and they suck . The business owner is wasting liens and money. So yeah, I'm really focusing on that now of just providing small businesses their own perfect closer in house and as well as building out the full sales SOPs and systems and recruitment process so that they can really scale. It's kind of the same even kind of my old tagline was like work on your business , not working your business . That's kind of what I'm trying to really go back to is just building that out and that's when I'll kind of have more of a team to expand that . So I'm really excited about that and getting onto my organic content because I always see all these people , especially these 20 year olds with so much content of their whole journey .